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  • Writer's pictureSumbella

How do you stop a bully in 2023?

Updated: May 3, 2023

[#defusebullying toolkit 🧰] How do you stop a bully in 2023? In this video, Brooks Gibbs, PhD, has a different way of describing #bullying - he calls it:

“Dominance behaviour”.

This is when someone tries to overpower another.

At the heart of it, he explains, is an “imbalance of power”: #bullies want to see you lose, and themselves win.

They want to be in control.

And because there are mean, mentally unhealthy people everywhere, no doubt you and your students will face some of this in the #newyear.

So no matter whether you’re experiencing subtle or overt bullying - no matter whether they call you an animal, a hotshot, too loud, too cheap, too young, too [insert race/nationality here] - whatever it is, I watched this helpful video and drew from the advice and ideas he showcases to distill these tips on how you and your #learners can defuse dominance behaviour:

1️⃣ Acknowledge their words, even if they’re mean or insulting. But don’t let their words sink in. Visualise water gliding off a duck’s back. No big deal. (From about 4 mins into the video there is a role play of Brooks Gibbs doing this). 💦🦆🤷🏻‍♀️

2️⃣ Spotlight any good qualities you can find in the #bully. Oft’ easier said than done. But do it. (Again, it's modelled in the video after 4 mins). 🌱

3️⃣ Let them know you’ll never, ever call them names back, talk badly of them behind their back, or hand them the same behaviour they’ve dealt you. Your goal is peace. 🕊

So if you are heading back into a #school setting or workplace where you or your #students are experiencing #dominancebehaviour, I hope this adds to your toolkit and helps you #defusebullying.

And like Brooks Gibbs does in the video - there are 3 important words in the #video that he encourages the audience to repeat out loud:




I, too, wish you and your #students and #learners all of these qualities when facing such challenges in 2023.

You got this. 💪💪💪

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